rimmalonna - Little book of poems

© rimmalonna, 2022

ISBN 978-5-0056-8973-3

Создано в интеллектуальной издательской системе Ridero

there’s always a story behind

You can always hide a little bit

Behind a foreign language as I did

I need a table with columns and rows

to help me

put the thoughts in where they belong

Anywhere, please

But not in my head

The noise is so loud I can’t go to bed

When I was a girl

I travelled the world

Searching for something

Searching for something

that nobody knows

Some time has passed

I feel like I’m lost

Needing somebody

Needing somebody

Who was in the past

Life brings you surprises

Let’s find where sunrise is

Guess who’s the wisest?

Let them be.

I ain’t getting better

Wrote you that letter

I thought it would rescue me,

I knew it could have rescued me

one or two fingers

touching me

forwards and backwards

multiple orgasms

are the ultimate words

When all the strings inside you break

And no one knows what you’re going through

There’s so much pain for one to take

I wish that one could give you a hug or two

So much metaphorical dirt and mud

You were my precious Achilles heel

After all these exes had sucked my blood

I put my favorite song and took a pill

They keep asking why

and where I’ve been

what time is it?

I say: kill me o’clock

I’m good with Irish goodbye

Please, don’t make a scene

and later we’ll see

who’s gonna rock

Listening to you song, drowning in your arms

It’s been a long time, long, since I played the drums

It’s been a hard time, hard, since you set me free

I didn’t see it coming and now I can’t breathe

It is already spring

Gimme a ring

I will pick up

To tell ya

About one more fuckup and failure

that life threw at me

There’s no one string

Inside

Left unbroken

Now guess who’s talking

Once closest now fake

Bring my old self back

I’m tired of bad luck stalking

In between

There ain’t just black and white, you say

But we’ve been through this twice

Unless you stay, spare the room

For better people in our lives

Russian poetic translation:

Говоришь, жизнь – не только черное и белое

Мы это уже проходили

Если не остаёшься, то уходи

Пока мне не надоело

Rhythm is a dancer.

Rhyme is all I got here.

Love is always answer

To yours what I do fear.

***

My body craves for touching yours,

I’ll get insane when it occurs.

Your hot’n’cold stare makes me numb,

Cannot but wait for you to come.

***

I’m fearful of the very thought of you,

Cuz nothing’s changed since Sunday morning came.

And only God knows when you say «I love you’,

I feel unsure of my reply’s the same

First things first but

cravings are on top

You think it won’t get better soon

Keep your eyes on

the prize when you feel low

Never mind giving in

Now I’m a spent firework;

but, jeez, at least,

I’ve been one

That’s how I live:

I come and go

no run is no fun

no fun

Inspired by David Mitchel, Cloud Atlas

When you put your lipstick on for the wrong person

This is when you realize it couldn’t have been worse

No one cares about your loss

Funny you should ask how we became this selfish

Extraordinary things forever perish

Know why? They are everywhere

Keeping us alive was a just game

It was coming through and finally came

The end, goodbye, I’m done

If I were you then I would give up

Unless you bury us you can’t live it up

No breaks, break up it is

You got used to licking love off the knifes, darling

Don’t you see how low down this time you’re falling?

Zone out, let that sink in

Find a boy who’d cherish you, not his own projections

You are not here to meet someone’s expectations

Enough, be strong, be whole

Love, next time don’t let me even close

Attention seekers always need a dose

It must’ve been something I never saw

It must’ve been something you never showed

How can someone feel it without a soul?

That once was like shipwrecked, then found washed ashore

Roads lead to the dead end though I don’t care

So let’s take the ferry and better sail

Discover unknown, make it sanctuary

It’s just you and me who could make it three

Though you didn’t have my heart broken

I’m pissed «bout how we’re still talkin’

There’s really nothing left for me to say

Go have a motherfucking life and day

***

I like the way some people

cloth their thoughts

in words

of languages that for me foreign.

This job is not a simple one,

but, hopefully,

I will learn how to do it

by myself, I promise.

Our parting ways doesn’t feel like a heartbreak

As we were extraordinary, no matter what we did make

As if we knew we could still be friends

If a break-up ever occurs

Cause you never were truly mine

And I wasn’t wholeheartedly yours

How terrifyingly thin is the line between

Crippling loneliness and its twin

Which is freedom

Labeling things is so hard

So much that it hurts

I wish people could read minds

What good are ambiguous words

A smiling freckled face

has finally realised

it’s time we ended that race

Just being will suffice

I remember the time I was loved

I remember the time I did love

Such a pity it was never at the same time

I stand and wait for stars to fall

Since here I am anticipating awe.

Though you’ve been searching for them all,

In vain you tried, my friend, I stole the show.

In vain you tried, my friend, I stole the show.

I’ve learned to push your buttons that’s for sure

The grass is greener if you say so

With empty hands you’re left unless you ask for more

I feel so lonely, but I’m not alone

There always be the people who

I love and who I’m loved by. You know

Temptation’s high, desire even more

Than I could possibly imagine

It seems ridiculous accept

The fact that I am here on my own

There’s no one by my side, although

I feel just fine

Before I met you on that plane

I never knew that I was wrong

Abandoned child in a woman’s body

The fatherless soul

That’s better? How to put it better?

Such a stare left me speechless

Nonetheless I’m not that reckless

So many fall behind

Let alone your exes

Who are the last deserve their second chances

How dare you behave this way?

I didn’t give you any cause

Now ’farewell’ I’m here to say,

Don’t ask me why, deal with your flaws

Thanks for drama, I need it for my art

в деревушке близ Мадрида

ровно четыре года назад

я увидела в этом дереве сердце,

загадав, чтоб в моём зацвёл дивный сад

благоухал, цвёл и пах,

в него приходили:

кто с миром, кто без, пытались сжигать

с особым старанием и напором гости изъяны пытались искать

готова, смотрите, смастерила табличку

крупно, разборчивым шрифтом, читайте:

в моём саду по приглашению птички.

токсики, нахуй, прошу, улетайте.

Вы охуеете, когда поймёте, насколько низко

Поступят люди, которых подпустили близко.

Что после выходки не сможете издать ни звука

Ни жалкого писка.

***

Давай договоримся о главном:

Есть твоя свобода, моя – мы на равных.