Once upon a time there was a Cheese Boy. Actually, his name was Vovka. He was quite an ordinary boy and not made of cheese at all. He just loved it very much. Well, tastes differ, you know. So do people. There are potato, bread, egg and milk folks, as well as meat and fish ones. Needless to say, the majority belongs to chocolate, cake or ice-cream people. But Vovka was a cheese person and his friend Ljoshka – a potato one. To tell the truth, at first Ljoshka didn’t like potatoes at all, but that is another story and we won’t tell it now.
As for Vovka, he liked cheese since he could remember himself. When Vovka became old enough to help his Mama and go out all by himself, he would do the shopping on the ground floor of their apartment building (because they had a grocery store there) almost every day. Usually he bought everything that his Mama had told him to buy – and some cheese. He knew all sorts of cheese. Not all the sorts in the world, of course, only the ones that were sold in shops. He never mixed them up. One glance was enough for him to tell whether it was Poshehonskij or Radonezhskij, Altaiskij or Lamber, Yaroslavskij or Edam, Kostromskoj or Gollandskij, Gornij or Rossijskij, Swiss cheese, brynza, Camamber or any other.
Naturally, shop assistants nicknamed Vovka the Cheese Boy. ”There he is again,” they would say. “He must have a large family to buy cheese every day!” They didn’t know that Vovka’s family was small, only his Mama and he himself. Well, of course, he had Grandpa and Grandma, and also Uncle and Aunt, but they lived so far and visited them not very often. Vovka lived with his mother and had cheese all for himself. Now, don’t think he was that greedy. The reason was simple – Mama didn’t like cheese and almost never had it. Sometimes (very seldom, though) she could try a little, but Vovka always had the most of it. He was able to eat more than half a kilo at once. But not only that – he could also make different tasty things of it: cheese-sprinkled potatoes, spaghetti, meat, fish or eggs – anything that could be cooked in a hot frying-pan. Then there were sandwiches – hot or cold, cheese salads, cheese sticks, cheese balls, cheese dumplings and cheese rolls, fried cheese in bread crumbs, cheese pan-cakes and tomatoes stuffed with cheese (sweet pepper, lettuce and eggs as well). Vovka even baked a cheese cake several times. No wonder he was called the Cheese Boy at home as well. Mama would always say, “How can you eat so much cheese? Aren’t you sick of it?” But Vovka was never sick of cheese. So, Mama only sighed, “All right, you may have it. Cheese is good for your health. It would be better, of course, if you also had milk, kefir, cottage cheese and sour cream. But if you don’t like them, eat more cheese. And don’t have only cheese – add some apples, carrots and walnuts, and make a salad out of it.”
Mama would always worry that Vovka didn’t eat properly. She was a pediatrician and didn’t like it when children ate little healthy food. Or (which was even worse) when they had unhealthy things, too sweet or salty. Mama – doctor would always criticize other Moms, when they gave their children too many sweets. Vovka’s Mama was strict and serious at her work, but at home she laughed a lot, and Vovka was glad that his Mama was so cheerful. It wasn’t like that all the time, though. Other children’s mothers scolded and sometimes punished them, but Vovka’s Mama wouldn’t say a word when she was angry, and then Vovka wished she would scold and punish him. Sometimes Mama didn’t laugh, only sighed, and that was when she felt very tired. She was responsible for a lot of children, and when they got sick, she had to come to everyone and prescribe the treatment. On those days she would come home, have a seat and wouldn’t say a word for a while. She would only say that her legs couldn’t walk anymore. When Vovka was little, he wondered what had happened to Mama’s legs. But later he began to understand that grown-ups talked that way when they were very tired. He had learned that when Mama’s legs couldn’t walk, they had to be put in a tub filled with water. Then Mama would get some rest and become cheerful again, and also surprised with how much cheese Vovka had eaten. And she would surely worry whether his stomach was all right. All doctors believe that there is always a chance to get a pain of some kind, especially when you have eaten too much of something tasty.
One day Vovka went to the store to buy some cheese, biscuits and sooshkas (bread-like doughnuts, only dry and hard) for his Grandpa and Grandma, because they had promised to call in. Grandpa and Grandma liked having tea. They would stay in the kitchen together with Mama for the whole evening and have tea until they were tired. Grandma liked dipping biscuits in her tea and Grandpa enjoyed crunchy sooshkas. All his false teeth were of metal, so it was easy for him to eat hard stuff.
So, Vovka went to the store. He thought of buying something for Uncle and Aunt, but then decided against it. You could never tell for sure, whether they were going to come. Uncle and Aunt had promised to call in so often, but then they had never had. Nevertheless, they could come without telling about it, and no one really objected. Uncle and Aunt had their own business and not much time, and everybody understood that. When they did come, they would always bring lots of tasty things, especially when no one expected them.
That was the reason why Vovka didn’t buy anything for his Uncle and Aunt. He decided to buy a chocolate bar for Mama instead. He thought that Uncle and Aunt might not come, but Mama would for sure – and she liked chocolate. It made her cheerful, and she often had it. Even when there was no chocolate left, Mama would smell the paper it was wrapped into and smile.
Vovka thought that over and bought biscuits, sooshkas and a chocolate bar. He did that rather fast. Buying cheese was a harder task, though. Vovka spent a lot of time standing in front of a shop window. The sorts of cheese were so many and it was so hard to pick up only one. There were white cheeses, yellow cheeses, with or without holes in them, soft cheeses, hard cheeses, smoked and salty ones and also curd cakes. Even the shape was different – round, rectangular or sliced. There were cheeses for a picnic, cheeses for tea and for a snack. And oh, how they smelled! Vovka even closed his eyes and shook his head.
When he opened his eyes again, he saw an old lady, but such a strange one that he even forgot which cheese he had chosen. The old lady was wearing an old-fashioned dress, the one that could be seen only in old movies or in a museum. Her hat was old-fashioned, too. Sometimes Vovka saw ladies that wore hats, decorated with flowers or bows. But on the old lady’s hat there were tiny cows and calves, sheep and lambs, and goats – all with little bells hanging on their necks! Vovka’s mouth went wide open.
